…and I don’t think I’m the only girl to have had this thought–and if not Tim Tebow, replace him with the name of some other attractive sports player, actor or musician.
I’m using Tim Tebow for the purpose of this post because much to my embarrassment, the thought “wouldn’t it be great if Tim Tebow was my boyfriend,” has crossed my mind. And he is a Christian–so in my imaginary world of us meeting and falling in love, I don’t have to worry about the whole “unequally yoked” thing. That’s a discussion for another day.
So that everyone is on the same page, let’s be clear:
- I don’t know Tim Tebow, and he has no idea of my existence.
- It’s safe to assume that I will never meet this man–and IF (that’s the biggest if) I did, I would probably not be able to form complete and coherent sentences. So love at first sight (which I don’t really believe exist, but we’ll save that for another day as well) would definitely be out because I’m sure he’d be trying to run as far away as possible.
- It would never work out between us anyways… I could never actually marry a Florida fan. Roll Tide.
Then why would I daydream about dating a complete stranger? I’ll give you the one ridiculous reason that reveals my black heart.
He’s famous. Plain and simple. I want to use him to boost my feeling of self worth. He’s wanted by so many women, so if he noticed me and wanted me, then I’d be special. I’d be better than all the others he didn’t choose.
I told you–my heart is black. And although my tone has been playful up until now–in hopes that you would continue reading–pining away after a famous stranger is no joke. It’s a serious issue (or let’s call it what is is–a sin) because it takes my gaze off of the One who sacrificed everything to redeem and rescue my heart.
Don’t misread me though–having a crush on someone or loving someone who actually knows you exist is not inherently wrong. But that’s not what I’m talking about here.
I’m talking about spending time dreaming about [insert celebrity stranger of your choice here] falling in love with you to prove to yourself that you are valuable and important. I’m talking about believing you can find your worth in the approval of man. I’m talking about lust. I’m talking about wasting time wishing that the man whom everyone likes will condescend to choose you, and by association, you’ll be liked and adored as well.
Maybe I’m the only one who struggles with this. But searching for our identity and worth and value in any arena apart from Christ leads us down a dangerous path because it leads us away from God–the only place we’ll find lasting joy and understand our true worth.
I don’t have any quick fixes for this problem–it’s a sin, and like any other sin we must go to war with it. We must stop believing the lie that our happiness can be found in any relationship (especially the imaginary ones) we place above pursuing our Savior.
So I pray. I pray that God would captivate my heart with his love and grandeur so that my soul doesn’t foolishly go to empty cisterns to find satisfaction because the Lord is the fountain of living water.
I go to His Word and pray he opens my eyes to beauty found in his promises and the joy found in the gospel.
And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience–among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ–by grace you have been saved–and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace toward us in Christ Jesus. (Ephesians 2:1-7, ESV, emphasis mine)
I remind my soul that the God who created the universe sent his Son to ransom my soul. To say he condescended to make me his own…well I can’t come up with a metaphor big enough to illustrate the understatement there.
I daily remind my heart that I am loved more deeply than I could ever imagine by the God who holds the universe together–and he will not stand to share the throne of my heart with another because he knows that putting my hope in a man or anything besides him will leave me empty. He is the only one who can satisfy my deepest longings.
Thus says the LORD: “Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the LORD. He is like a shrub in the desert, and shall not see any good come. He shall dwell in the parched places of the wilderness in an uninhabited salt land.
Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is in the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit. (Jeremiah 17:5-8, ESV)